Legacies
by Hellsig Otoupeim
Summary: Legacies are heavy things to carry. They drag you down and sink you beneath the surface, chains around your ankles far heavier than any could be. You sink, and sink, and sink underneath the weight of their legacies; and you think that, perhaps, failed ones are the heaviest of them all. Dystopian!AU Sakura-centric


Legacies (the moon had eyes to see)

Disclaimer: I do not own Kishimoto's Naruto, and do not make any profit from this.

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Legacies, you find, are curses placed upon you by bitter friends. You do not understand how it could be any other way.

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Your name is Haruno Sakura; ANBU registration 012601 – Byakko –, apprentice to the Godaime Hokage, personal help to the Rokudaime and the Nanadaime and all this matters very little now. Your name was Haruno Sakura, though now they call you Kit and leave it at that. Your name was Haruno Sakura.

You close your eyes because keeping them open doesn't change a thing. The underground compound you hide in is dark, perhaps even darker than the Yomi and you wonder where you have gone so horribly wrong for the world to punish you thus. Your name is Haruno Sakura, though any who might have once called you that are dead. Your name was Haruno Sakura. You keep it close to your chest and whisper it at night, because you know that the moment Haruno Sakura dies is the moment Kit becomes real.

Kit, you wish, would never become real.

You were the apprentice to the Godaime (but she died, taking Madara down with her and really; there is nothing else you can say to that but _thankyou_ and _Iloveyou_ ) and then you were the personal aid to the Rokudaime (ah, Naruto, Naru-chan who burnt so bright, soso _so_ bright but it never lasted and you wonder why, wonder _when_ the fates brought Kaguya into the mix. Naruto, Rokudaime not even long enough to see his own face engraved in the rock walls of Konoha, he stares at you every day, stares and stares and stares because you were his assistant and his medic and he is gone somewhere even you cannot follow. Sasuke tore space and time; and Naruto tackled Kaguya in and the Bastard died and Naruto went but you _were left behind_ ) and then you were the personal aid to the Nanadaime (Kakashi, Kakashi-sensei who sealed his life when Naruto's death became obvious. Kakashi-sensei who pulled the Kyuubi out of Konoha, as if it were a nightmare on repeat, seventeen years later, and stuffed him inside your head because you were the nearest thing on hand; Kakashi sensei who made the same deal as his own sensei and you are the last and wonder if you too will die thus. The ruby eyes stare and growl because Kurama was once unleashed and you haven't found yet how to remove the cage and he chafes at your mind.) but all this matters little now. Now you are Kit, because the seal on your face is ugly and beautiful and they both fear and love it. Now you are Kit, because you have the power of a biju and near perfect chakra control and really – how come you haven't died yet? You think you are the next on the list and the darkness that surrounds you agrees.

They are all dead.

Your name is Kit, though it once was Haruno Sakura, and you wonder how the world turned so bleak. (You close your eyes, because the darkness of the compound is more oppressing than the thought of your nightmares and hope against hope not to dream tonight.)

Your name is Kit. You feel yourself drown in the darkness, because they have gone and left you behind and their last promises are heavy things around your ankles. (Their dying breaths choke you far better than any hand could ever hope to.)

To the Godaime; you swore to live. She smiled and kissed your brow – and you had to bow down to her because she had lost arms and legs and heart but Madara was dead and she had triumphed. She had a smile on her face, because Tsunade Senju was a coward in life but died a hero's death and Konoha (you, Naruto, Kakashi, Shizune) were worth dying for. She died with the Strength of a Hundred Seal on her skin and she was beautiful even when her body failed her.

To Naruto; you screamed and screamed and he answered with a smile, but it burnt brighter than the sun and scorched itself on your soul. Naruto made you promise, in that smile, to live and laugh and shine and you find yourself wearing that promise heavily on your tongue. You never were good at shining and here you are, lost in the darkness with ruby eyes in your head. You know the Kyubi misses Naruto in a way a prisoner should never miss his jailer, but you aren't even half of what your teammate was and you do your best, you really do; but your best nowadays amounts to surviving.

To the Bastard, the bastard whose name you cannot even dare pronounce because _what an asshole_ , to the Bastard there was a lot of anger and the will to deny him that last wish if it hadn't been yours at the time too. "Kill them all, Sakura. Kill them all." You promised that, with a clear mind and full voice; because living and shining didn't have to mean you had anyone else beside you and right now you _hated_ them all too. Danzo vying for power and the Akatsuki, broken as they are, hiding in the shadows and ghosts of ages past and you wish, oh how you wish, that you had the power to end it all. To end them all.

It's Kakashi-sensei who gives you that power. Kakashi sensei who didn't believe in you until you proved yourself to him and then considered you his partner, Kakashi-sensei who loved and cared for you and nurtured you even when you were the Godaime's far more than his and Kakashi-sensei who stood with you when your mother and father died and held you when you cried and told you it was all gonna be okay because sensei was here – _and you believed him_. Kakashi sensei who cried on your shoulder in return when Gai was no more than a green jumpsuit and Kakashi-sensei who came to you with a desperate face because Asuma and Kurenai were gone and the little baby had nowhere to go with Shikamaru missing in action and Ino dead _deaddead_ and Choji fading and he was the _last_ one of their generation and he was going to die. Kakashi-sensei who was human and who lasted longer than most, longer than his generation and yours and the one before him; Kakashi-sensei who killed a Sannin and faced a goddess only to crumble before the Shinigami. Kakashi-sensei who _chose_ to die and leave you with a burden inscribed upon your skin; Kakashi-sensei who you wish you could hate but love too much.

It's Kakashi-sensei who gives you that power to wreck the world, the power and the will to do it because with him gone Konoha is just a name. You were Sakura Haruno, ANBU registration 012601 – Byakko – but now you are a legacy of times gone by and, you find, failed legacies are perhaps the hardest of all burdens to bear.

You close your eyes in the darkness, because whether you keep them open or closed makes no change, and silently hope that your dreams will be softer than the stone that digs in your back. You were Haruno Sakura once, but now you are Kit and you desperately wish you could turn back time.

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In your dream, there is soft grass tickling your ear. The sun is warm across your back and sweat stenches the air around you. You hear a quiet breath next to yours, a breeze ruffles the training ground and chills your skin. You are cold, on this lovely afternoon. It's a blessing. (The earth is permanently scorched and the sun beats heavily down on you. You were a Leaf and now the forests are razed down to the ground and there is no such thing as shade. Your skin burns in the sun. You were Leaf; but Leaf and Mist and Cloud and Stone and Sand are dead and nothing will ever live again.) The person next to you is warm, warmer than a corpse and so you roll onto your side and curl in contentment. ( _This is one of the nicer dreams_ ) A hand rests sleepily on your head. You smile.

In the distance, you can hear faint calls of your name. Kakashi-sensei chuckles, asks you if you had a meeting and you sheepishly reply that you were meant to see Shizune at ten. (You cannot remember if it is right; but this is your dream and never before have you been called out on those details.) It's one in the afternoon, and you think Kakashi radiates far more pride than he should.

"_Sakura-chan, Kakashi-san. Godaime-hime asks for you. There is a mission of high importance that must be carried."

You know what that means (" _go get me sake!"_ in Tsunade speech) so both you and Kakashi roll up to a standing position with grins on your faces. Naruto is Kami-knows-where and Sasuke has defected; but this is one of the nicer memories. You wonder when you will wake up.

You could run to the Hokage tower, but Kakashi sensei likes to stroll and you have missed him enough to indulge the man; so you take your time. The streets are familiar and the faces joyful, and once more you feel the pang of regret searing through your chest. You miss the way the world was, before Kaguya and Madara and Akatsuki. You miss the in between, and gosh you would give anything for the world to turn back to what it was. Kurama sighs in your head. ( _He wishes you would dream of Naruto more often, and a part of you feels indecipherably sorry for the great fox. You can escape but he is victim to your simpering wishes._ )

"_Sakura? Are you alright?"

Kakashi shakes you from your reverie, and you startle at the question. This is not, generally, how the story goes. You roll with it regardless, because you remember times when you tried to tell him not to die only to see Kakashi sensei melt before your eyes. You know better than to contradict the dreams.

"_I am fine, Kakashi sensei. Happy to be here."

He glances at you oddly, but you think there is a smile underneath that mask. You smile in response.

Gosh, Tsunade is so real it hurts. Images of her dying, black marking staining pale skin and blood _gushing_ , overlap with the woman sitting in her chair, head in her hands because her hangover is _biting_ ¸ and you feel something a lot like tears bubble up in your throat. Gosh you have missed that woman who was your mother and your confidante and who believed in you and taught you and loved you and turned you into the better parts of yourself. You miss the woman who made you promise to _live_ as she died and something inside your chest, perhaps your heart, goes supernova. Kurama smiles. (Naruto loved Tsunade a lot too.)

"_what took you so long?" she grumbles unhappily into her paperwork, and you cannot help but stride forward and smooth her brow with a glowing hand. Her hangover disappears, and Tsunade looks up at you, startled. Gosh you love that woman. Gosh you wish she didn't have to be just a dream, just a fragment of your broken imagination because Tsunade is worth so much more than nostalgia and regrets; she is the better part of you and everything you once aspired to be. Tsunade is your mother and your teacher and your healer and she made you grow and loved you and nurtured you and everything good you have done in this world; it is in her name. Kami, you broke the promise the instant you made it. _You died with her_. Gods, you love your Godaime. "Sakura?"

You say it, folding down to embrace the Godaime, and as you say it you shut your eyes and hope that the world will not crumble around you. You know better than to contradict a dream, but Sakura Haruno is not dead yet. You say it, embracing the Godaime and clinging onto her as if the world would fall from under your feet and as you say it, you silently wish the woman who made you goodbye. You know you will wake up after this, because you never did quite manage to say it in real life and dream worlds are prickly like that.

"_I love you." you say. "Thank you so much."

You wait for the world to end.

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You open your eyes, and it is not darkness that greets you. You are still in the Godaime's office and her skin is still warm and supple under your hands. She is still there, looking at you strangely as you hold her. Your throat closes. ( _What is going on?_ )

"_Sakura?" she asks, quietly – and you figure out that right now you must look like a startled prey. "Sakura, what is it?"

You let her go, because you have held on too tightly for too long, but she still does not waver and your reality shakes. You want to ask her if she is real, want to ask her if she is _here_ , but instead you whirl to Kakashi-sensei and lift his headband and _stare_. ( _The Sharingan spins and spins and spins; and your dream world never quite managed to move past the gaping socket of a gauged out eye. The Kyubi always hated the Sharingan.)_ Kakashi's grip on your arms is firm.

"_Sacchan?"

You blink rapidly, because there are tears in your eyes. You feel as if the earth has been swiped from underneath you, as if the world has shifted sharply two inches to the right and things are all out of place. You wonder if the laughter inside your mind is the Kyubi and when ruby eyes gaze out of their cage, all bright and mirthful, you know that this is not a dream. This is _not_ a dream.

This is real.

You lose the battle with the tears, but it doesn't matter too much because Kakashi-sensei is here and Tsunade-hime is calling your name and Naruto is _somewhere_ , safe and healthy with the Ero-sannin and _everything will be fine_. You are scared to close your eyes, scared to see them go before your vision but you blink and _here they stay_.

You sob and smile and the Kyubi inside of your mind laughs.

Your name is Haruno Sakura. You still are ANBU registration number 012601 – Byakko – and are still apprentice to the Godaime and personal help to both the Rokudaime and the Nanadaime, but you also were Kit and some things cannot disappear from your skin. You have a seal on your face that appears when someone touches it with chakra, and a demon in your mind who would rather live with your teammate – but you are Haruno Sakura and you have been given ( _by some miracle_ ) a second shot at life.

When you go to sleep, that night, it is with a smile on your face and a warmth in your heart.

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You open your eyes and it is dark. You do not understand. The Kyuubi howls in your mind. ( _He thrashes against his bonds and screams and roars, because he believed in the world he was shown and life was beautiful there, far more beautiful inside this dream than what you can offer him now – and he wants to go back!_ )

This, you realise with dread, is but your first taste of the Infinite Tsukuyomi.


End file.
